Hubby Obsessed with Reoccurance

[slops_1]

Hi. I am using my husband's profile, as the site will only regisiter one person from our shared e-mail address. I hope it is ok because he swears by the forum and knows I am using his account.

My hubby is 35 and had a left I/O on 3/5. 100% seminoma, limited to the testicle, no spread to cord, nodes, etc. With the guidance of his urologist and oncologist he is opting for survelliance as a follow-up.

At his six week post-op appointment with the urologist, we were both nervous because he found a hard spot on his right testicle and I felt it. At the doc's office, both he and the doctor were unable to detect it and the ultrasound was clear. The doctor wants to see him in a few weeks to check again, just to be precautious.

The problem is my husband is a nervous wreck. I find him checking himself constantly and every discomfort he has is either a new occurance or a reoccurance depending on where he hurts. The hard spot he originally found is still there, but he cannot find it regularly.

He's miserable and I want to do whatever is necessary to ease his mind. Any thoughts would help. Thanks in advance.

[Fish]

Fear of recurrence or of a new cancer is very common for survivors. However, when the worrying becomes an obsession, it is time to seek professional help. My psych says that most cancer survivors and many caregivers suffer from post-traumatic stress syndrome. Your husband's current doc can prescribe an anti-anxiety med such as lorazepam, which can help, but sometimes talking things out is also part of re-gaining control over the fear and anxiety; so a psychiatrist can be a big help. Even with adequate treatment, anxiety attacks can still sneak up on you. Just be aware and prepared.

But do get your husband to talk to his doc or find a counselor, living with such a high level of anxiety is just plain miserable.

[djmac]

[QUOTE=Paul54]

If the fear or a recurrence is driving either or both of you that crazy, then you are not good candidates for surveillance. You should discuss adjuvant (preventive) radiation or single agent chemo (carboplation), which is one or two doses.[QUOTE]

Hi, just to chime in,

It may be a bit too late for adjuvant treatment at this point (usually they like to do radiation within 6 weeks, I don't know about carboplatin, but its probably similar.) I disagree that you are necessarily bad candidates for surveillance... looking back I was a wreck at 6 weeks out (hell, I was a wreck at 6 months out). Trust me, it get easier...You are still recovering from the shock of it all, and every pain or cough, or any symptom at all is going to trigger anxious thoughts.

At almost 3 months out I had an MRI because of back pain that I was sure was a metastasis to my spine. THe docs, not wanting to take any chances, relented and let me get my expensive test.

My primary, at follow-up, did a quick psych profile on me. He found out the things that in my past had helped me with anxiety... and we came up with exercise (I used to run Marathons, 1/2 Marathons, etc.). He then gve me a choice..."Buspirone or Exercise, your choice. I recommend exercise, but here is a script for buspar in case you decide not to follow the exercise recommendation." I chose exercise :) .

One thing to note is that it seems to me that its rare that docs recommend surveillance for seminoma outright, due to the difficulty in detecting relapses (usually no blood markers). For them to do so, they must be quite confident. I would find comfort that they made such a recommendation, and remember that cure for a recurrance is the rule, not the exception.

Best,

djm

[Smartie]

Hi !

I think what he is going through could well be regarded as simply a normal response to the very abnormal situation he finds himself in. I had TC 6 1/2 years ago, and for a long time after that I felt extreme anxiety. To be honest, I don't think my extreme reaction to the fact that I had cancer was an over-reaction, I think it was a proportionate reaction to a situation that was beyond anything I'd ever expected to have to deal with.

I hope that makes sense. What I'm trying to say is that even though the paranoia can be very strong, it can also be a natural reaction to having this diagnosis.

Nowadays I have days of anxiety, but I have learned to live with it and have a very happy life. I don't want to discourage you from seeking help or treatment for the anxiety - I have. On the other hand, it does get better with time.

[jaybird]

I also would like to stress the fact that it does get better over time. I remember shortly after my initial treatment my remaining testicle started to ached and I obsessed over it. The hardest part of surviving cancer is dealing with all the new emotions and fears that do not go away but rather become something he needs to learn to live with.

If the ultrasound did not see anything then that should be pretty reassuring.

[MRMRSU]

Hi Mrs. "Slops 1" - I hope that things have calmed a bit for you and for your hubby. Worry is a very real and unwelcomed side effect of being diagnosed with cancer, and I can assure you that 99.9% of the guys here as well as their caregivers have experienced the same fear and anxiety. Talking to someone would be a great avenue to help you...and if not to a professional, then we're here to lend our support. Best wishes always!