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6 month Ct scan tommorow -Major nerves

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  • 6 month Ct scan tommorow -Major nerves

    So the first post chemo scans are tomorrow but we have to wait till Monday to meet with Onc for results. Both my husband and I are nervous wrecks. We thought we were fine for the most part but today all the what ifs have hit hard. We know the odds are in our favor but being that the odds were in favor of NOT getting TC in the first place we don't seem to find any meaningful measure of comfort in statistics these day. Definitely glad they are in our favor non the less, but still not finding much relief at the moment.

    Does everyone feel this way even in a stage 1 adjuvant therapy case? Will the stress ever ease up or is this what we can look forward to for the next 5 years? Any things that helped you guys get through the scanxiety?

    I know my husband feels guilt for his anger, fear and sadness over this TC experience as it could have been so much worse especially having been his brothers caretaker when he went through a hellish ordeal to be cured. Of course there is deep gratitude as well. I guess the conflicting emotions compound the thing into one big fat emotional/mental sack of crap.

    In general we both feel like our sense of safety and security is at risk of never returning. Just hoping a least something will get better with time.
    2/7/18- Husband diagnosed
    2/12/18- I/O- Stage 1b 99% embryonal carcinoma 1%seminoma/yolk -CT's clear -All markers in normal range
    3/12/18-4/1/18 Adjuvant BEPx1

  • #2
    You guys are actually doing good dealing with it. I would get a headache and was sure it was TC coming back. Slight pain in my side assumed it was TC coming back.
    So to answer your queation yes the farther out you get the easier the anxiety becomes.
    But you and he will never stop thinking about it. You just get better at dealing with the thoughts.
    What helped me through it was faith not just spiritual faith, but faith in the Doctors knew what they were doing. Trust but verify. Faith in that i would be a better person to myself and others around. It does get better as it goes along, the unknown is what is so scary not the results. When you get good news from the results you will say whats next. Stay positive as best you can even if you have to fake it for your friends and loved ones. But he will be okay
    Last edited by eodtech2001; 10-03-18, 10:27 PM.
    Jan 2012- U/S mass in Left testicle
    Feb 2012- I/O performed to remove cancer
    Mar 1,2012- pathology pure seminoma
    Mar 7, 2012 PET SCAN stage IIa
    April 2012 Mayo clinic carbolite.
    May 2012 carbolite failed, started BEP x3
    August 7th 2012- BEP complete
    April 2013 CT/PET show relapse
    May 2013 RPLND
    Aug 2013 Relapse again Started VIeP x2
    Oct 2013 HDC AUTOLOGOUS
    Dec 2013 HDC completed CT/PETSCAN 1.1 cm x .8 cm right lower lung lobe
    Feb 2014 confirmed false positive all clear FINALLY !
    Jan 2015 1 year cancer free Pet/CT scan
    Jan 2016 2 years cancer free "Pet/CT scan
    Jan 2017 3 years cancer free "Pet/CT scan
    Jab 2018 4 years cancer free "Pet/CT scan, labs, xrays

    Comment


    • #3
      Thank you! Hes definitely noticing every ache and pain and working to not let his mind get the better of him
      Last edited by melanie; 10-04-18, 09:27 AM.
      2/7/18- Husband diagnosed
      2/12/18- I/O- Stage 1b 99% embryonal carcinoma 1%seminoma/yolk -CT's clear -All markers in normal range
      3/12/18-4/1/18 Adjuvant BEPx1

      Comment


      • #4
        Yes, Melanie, it's scary, crazy and it just doesn't add up or make sense... But it does get better!! I'm nearing 2 years and finding my own ways to deal with the wait. I tried my best to look at it differently - every scan a checkpoint to see if I have been living the life I want, and if so, I've done everything in my power to stay on top of the mind games and have not let any opportunities go to waste. Good luck with the result, hope it all goes to plan
        Last edited by JoeTheAstronaut; 10-04-18, 06:32 AM.
        July 2016 - Left I/O
        December 2016 - BEPx3
        All clear for 1 year!

        My Testicular Cancer Support Kit
        First Oncologist Visit Checklist
        Simplify Cancer Podcast

        Comment


        • #5
          Thanks! Glad to hear it can get easier
          2/7/18- Husband diagnosed
          2/12/18- I/O- Stage 1b 99% embryonal carcinoma 1%seminoma/yolk -CT's clear -All markers in normal range
          3/12/18-4/1/18 Adjuvant BEPx1

          Comment


          • #6
            Melaine, I don't think your alone in how you are feeling. I just try to take it one day at a time, say my prayers that everything is okay and be ready for the news if it's not. Educate myself on what the next steps could be.
            My son just had his 2nd post chemo scan last week and apt with the oncologist. Didn't want his dad and I there, I think he was expecting bad news. Thank goodness everything is still okay. The remaining lymph node is even smaller than the first post chemo scan which they think is now just scar tissue and blood work is now every 3 months and scans every 7. I think I have more PTSD than my son. Sending positive thoughts your way and please keep us posted.

            2A 95% EC 5% Yolk
            3X BEP
            3/15/18 All Clear
            9/20/18 All Clear

            Comment


            • #7
              Thank you Ann. Glad your sons scan is clean! What a relief. Being mom in this situation must be so overpoweringly scary. I constantly fear that TC is coming for our 17 year old son next since both his Dad and Uncle had it. I have to actively push the fear away. I Do feel like Both my husband and I are dealing with some form of PTSD as well. We are so ready to put this behind us and move on but it seems its just not that easy. Anyway, hes off to the hospital now. I hate we have to wait all weekend for results. Not a recipe for a relaxing weekend,but what can you do
              2/7/18- Husband diagnosed
              2/12/18- I/O- Stage 1b 99% embryonal carcinoma 1%seminoma/yolk -CT's clear -All markers in normal range
              3/12/18-4/1/18 Adjuvant BEPx1

              Comment


              • #8
                Melanie,
                You and your husband are doing great - you're only a few days away. My first post-adjuvant CT Scan is in 8 weeks... and I think about it multiple times a day already. I think many of us "newbies" are on high alert almost all of the time. The anxiety can be exhausting. I think it gets better with time for most people.

                It's great that we can communicate with people on the forum that have already been where we are.

                Best of luck to you and your husband.

                Take care,
                John
                6/4/18 BHCG 452, AFP 1
                6/13/18 CT Scan, no involvement beyond left testicle
                6/18/18 Radical Left inguinal orchiectomy, Pathology pure seminoma, rete testis obliterated
                6/29/18 BHCG 7, AFP 1.5 (calc 1.8 half-life)
                7/12/18 BHCG<1, AFP 1.5, LDH 220, Diagnosed as Stage 1b, T3N0
                7/25/18 Adjuvant Chemotherapy, 780mg Carboplatin
                8/27/18 Chest CT Scan clear
                9/7/18 BHCG<2, AFP 2.0, LDH 182 (Different lab w/diff ranges than initial tests)
                9/26/18 MRI to review liver cysts for possible metastasis, all clear. No lymphadenopathy
                11/19/18 Next blood test
                11/23/18 Next CT Scan
                11/30/18 follow up with oncologist

                Comment


                • #9
                  If he is getting the scan today you should be able to go to relase of information tomorrow and get a copy of the report before the weekend. I do it all the time, it should be less than a 24 hr turn round time on Radiology reading it and posting the results to his medical file
                  Jan 2012- U/S mass in Left testicle
                  Feb 2012- I/O performed to remove cancer
                  Mar 1,2012- pathology pure seminoma
                  Mar 7, 2012 PET SCAN stage IIa
                  April 2012 Mayo clinic carbolite.
                  May 2012 carbolite failed, started BEP x3
                  August 7th 2012- BEP complete
                  April 2013 CT/PET show relapse
                  May 2013 RPLND
                  Aug 2013 Relapse again Started VIeP x2
                  Oct 2013 HDC AUTOLOGOUS
                  Dec 2013 HDC completed CT/PETSCAN 1.1 cm x .8 cm right lower lung lobe
                  Feb 2014 confirmed false positive all clear FINALLY !
                  Jan 2015 1 year cancer free Pet/CT scan
                  Jan 2016 2 years cancer free "Pet/CT scan
                  Jan 2017 3 years cancer free "Pet/CT scan
                  Jab 2018 4 years cancer free "Pet/CT scan, labs, xrays

                  Comment


                  • #10
                    eodtech2001- I had no idea that was possible. I will let him know. He might be too afraid to get bad news without the doctor there though. Thanks for the information
                    2/7/18- Husband diagnosed
                    2/12/18- I/O- Stage 1b 99% embryonal carcinoma 1%seminoma/yolk -CT's clear -All markers in normal range
                    3/12/18-4/1/18 Adjuvant BEPx1

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      johnm620 thanks for your reply. When did you have your adjuvant BEP? what was you tumor type and stage?

                      Its comforting to hear everyone's stories.

                      So far his family has made him feel stupid (parents and brother) for his continued stress and anxiety since it wasn't as bad as his brothers and in their mind over and done with.

                      Which is awful, ignorant and cruel. He is struggling with feeling anger and sadness over the experience because he feels like somehow that makes him ungrateful for catching it early


                      2/7/18- Husband diagnosed
                      2/12/18- I/O- Stage 1b 99% embryonal carcinoma 1%seminoma/yolk -CT's clear -All markers in normal range
                      3/12/18-4/1/18 Adjuvant BEPx1

                      Comment


                      • #12
                        Sounds like someone needs to put thier foot up his families ass. So who smater his brother for ignoring or your husband for knowing what to look for and getting it taken care of sooner.
                        You cant choose your family, but you dsm sure can choose not to talk to them
                        Jan 2012- U/S mass in Left testicle
                        Feb 2012- I/O performed to remove cancer
                        Mar 1,2012- pathology pure seminoma
                        Mar 7, 2012 PET SCAN stage IIa
                        April 2012 Mayo clinic carbolite.
                        May 2012 carbolite failed, started BEP x3
                        August 7th 2012- BEP complete
                        April 2013 CT/PET show relapse
                        May 2013 RPLND
                        Aug 2013 Relapse again Started VIeP x2
                        Oct 2013 HDC AUTOLOGOUS
                        Dec 2013 HDC completed CT/PETSCAN 1.1 cm x .8 cm right lower lung lobe
                        Feb 2014 confirmed false positive all clear FINALLY !
                        Jan 2015 1 year cancer free Pet/CT scan
                        Jan 2016 2 years cancer free "Pet/CT scan
                        Jan 2017 3 years cancer free "Pet/CT scan
                        Jab 2018 4 years cancer free "Pet/CT scan, labs, xrays

                        Comment


                        • #13
                          eodtech2001 100% Right on my friend! My husband dropped out of school to care for his brother and when it was bros turn to just be emotional support and share knowledge all he could do was talk about his experience and how terrible everything is. Husband couldn't take it as he already has a bit of PTSD from his brothers crap that didn't need to be added to his diagnosis and stopped calling him. Parents are useless. As long as they can ignore things they are happy to do so. Dad said to him last week "well you sure dogged a bullet" uh no dad, it hit me, not fatal but a direct hit man and it still ****ing hurts.
                          Last edited by melanie; 10-04-18, 07:37 PM.
                          2/7/18- Husband diagnosed
                          2/12/18- I/O- Stage 1b 99% embryonal carcinoma 1%seminoma/yolk -CT's clear -All markers in normal range
                          3/12/18-4/1/18 Adjuvant BEPx1

                          Comment


                          • #14
                            It would be poetic justice to kick his dad square in his junk and then say, "Boy dad you sure did dodge that bullet!!" Then just walk away smiling.
                            Jan 2012- U/S mass in Left testicle
                            Feb 2012- I/O performed to remove cancer
                            Mar 1,2012- pathology pure seminoma
                            Mar 7, 2012 PET SCAN stage IIa
                            April 2012 Mayo clinic carbolite.
                            May 2012 carbolite failed, started BEP x3
                            August 7th 2012- BEP complete
                            April 2013 CT/PET show relapse
                            May 2013 RPLND
                            Aug 2013 Relapse again Started VIeP x2
                            Oct 2013 HDC AUTOLOGOUS
                            Dec 2013 HDC completed CT/PETSCAN 1.1 cm x .8 cm right lower lung lobe
                            Feb 2014 confirmed false positive all clear FINALLY !
                            Jan 2015 1 year cancer free Pet/CT scan
                            Jan 2016 2 years cancer free "Pet/CT scan
                            Jan 2017 3 years cancer free "Pet/CT scan
                            Jab 2018 4 years cancer free "Pet/CT scan, labs, xrays

                            Comment


                            • #15
                              HAHAHA! You need to be our friend
                              2/7/18- Husband diagnosed
                              2/12/18- I/O- Stage 1b 99% embryonal carcinoma 1%seminoma/yolk -CT's clear -All markers in normal range
                              3/12/18-4/1/18 Adjuvant BEPx1

                              Comment

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