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Anxiety while on surveillance

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  • Anxiety while on surveillance

    I just got the all clear a couple weeks ago and am finally on surveillance (woohoo!), but even with my next check up in 3 months can't help but worry. I was 2A 100% embryonal so I feel I caught it fairly early with a histology that is extremely curable with BEP. My AFP had a strange uptick but was cut in a half a few weeks later which is what it should do based on its half life. Knowing all this I still sometimes worry. How do you all deal with your anxiety. Statistically speaking I know I am in all likelihood cured and will need to keep telling myself that.
    3/29/17 Diagnosed 100% Embryonal 4/10/17 Left I/O CT scan shows a few suspicious lymph (biggest 1.9 cm) 5/8/17 - 7/3/17 3xBEP 7/20/17 CT scan clear, AFP was 19. 8/16/17 AFP drops to 10. Doctor pleased ALL CLEAR!

  • #2
    I had my 1st surveillance tests last week and had to wait over the weekend for the results all i can say is thank god for xanax the anxiety was terrible thankfully all test come back good i hope it gets a little easier in 3 months time

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    • #3
      I'm about a week out of my first all clear and I have thought about that first checkup a few times. But getting back to normal life has kept my mind off it pretty well. Im sure we will both get the all clear again in a few months time!

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      • #4
        The AFP really had me worried, but I read about half lives and how chemo can make things weird with them. seeing it literally cut in half was a huge relief. During chemo it went up a bit and a month or so after it was lower than it was during chemo which is what we wanted to see!
        3/29/17 Diagnosed 100% Embryonal 4/10/17 Left I/O CT scan shows a few suspicious lymph (biggest 1.9 cm) 5/8/17 - 7/3/17 3xBEP 7/20/17 CT scan clear, AFP was 19. 8/16/17 AFP drops to 10. Doctor pleased ALL CLEAR!

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        • #5
          I was quite anxious for the first couple of blood tests and then the first ct scan follow up too. What has helped me was remembering what Davepet wrote once. He said he looked at follow ups as confirmation that he was cured. That change in attitude made a big difference to me. Also my knowing that if I did relapse it wasn't the end of the road, just another bump in it.

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          • #6
            Yep, I know what you mean, the closer I get to the checkup (got one next week), the more nervous I get... I guess what helps me is the attitude I taken on with cancer, spending as time much time as possible with people I care about most, not on any commitments I never wanted in the first place and on new projects that mean the world to me, like my book and my blog. It stops mind from wondering off with scary thoughts!

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            • #7
              Originally posted by GratefulGuy View Post
              I was quite anxious for the first couple of blood tests and then the first ct scan follow up too. What has helped me was remembering what Davepet wrote once. He said he looked at follow ups as confirmation that he was cured. That change in attitude made a big difference to me. Also my knowing that if I did relapse it wasn't the end of the road, just another bump in it.
              GratefulGuy I am glad that my words were helpful. That is why I keep coming here, because it makes me feel good when I know I've helped someone get through some part of this ordeal.

              dcalandrelli: Every guy handles stress differently. What works for me is to imagine what I'm worried about actually happens & make a plan to deal with it. Once I have a plan, the worry kinda goes away.... Give it a try.

              Dave
              Jan, 1975: Right I/O, followed by RPLND
              Dec, 2009: Left I/O, followed by 3xBEP

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              • #8
                Hello all,
                It's been a very long night time since I have posted. I read this and remembered how terrified I was with my first check-ups. I was misdiagnosed for a year and a half, stage 3B ( nonseminoma mixed, majority yolk sac) when finally diagnosed. almost the whole time I did chemo, I didn't really sweat it. I knew I was fighting it, and when the numbers started dropping and metastasis started Shrinking, I started to feel optimistic. But after my first "all clear", the anxiety set in tremendously.
                You go from fighting and winning, to this delusion that you are just waiting for it to come back. I was a wreck. I thought every odd sensation and pain was a recurrence. The only thing that helped me out was writing music. Dive into something you are passionate about. It's the only way I could get my brain to see passed the checkups as markers to breathe more easily.
                Also, I think Dave gave some great advice. I thought about all the crappy "what ifs". And then I would come up with a game plan for what I'd do if things went that way.
                congrats on the all clear! It gets easier. Soon, the thought of cancer won't even be in your head!

                All the best,

                Joe
                diagnosed august 09 stage 1S
                august 09 left I/O
                october started 4x bep
                Re dx. stage III Intermediate risk
                Dec. 17th finished chemo

                Jan 29th all clear

                April 15th all clear

                July 15th all clear

                September 24th all clear

                february 12' two year all clear

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