worried, looking for advice

[mark-t92]

hey all,

first thing, im going to make this as detailed as possible to give you the best idea of whats happening and to hopefully get the best advice based on symptoms etc. I would say im a bit of a hypochondriac (and always assume the worst), and because of my constant worry of thinking this is something really bad, i seem to of got slight anxiety over it, and its really stressing me out. I dont seem to have it in me to go to the dr and get it checked i dont know why but even though I know i need to, I just cant do it.. so telling me to do that isnt going to help me much..

basically, ive had a "dull ache" as some describe it 'down there' for quite some time, as long as i can remember.. I think ive had it for about 3-4 years. The dull ache seems to come and go, some weeks its constant every day, and then I could go several days with no aches at all.. and then it'll come back, etc.. On the left side, im quite sure theres some kind of varicocele thing going on as it gets really lumpy (soft lumps) like veins, and from my research this would suggest that. But then on my right side, ive also got 1 or 2 soft lumps, (not sure if they're normal ones or not), and also several hard lumps, although very small. Towards one end of the right testical theres like two pin-prick type bumps which are definitely on the tesicle, and then down the other side of the right testical (between the middle and the end, slightly off centre) is a hard-ish thing as what I would best describe feels like an uncooked grain of rice (same feel, and size). So were not talking about anything big here..

As for symptoms, ive been getting the classic back ache at the top of my back, and a lot of back ache on my lower back. Also get abdominal pain, chest pain, constant headaches, a few months ago I was getting nausea for several months like every day.. just before christmas I felt ill with bad chest pain, and had a bad "panic attack" my doctor told me it was.. (this was so bad I was literally on the floor, racing heart and thought I was going to die!, took me about 5 hours to eventually get to sleep) - had a few mild ones since then but nowhere near as bad. Also ive noticed that im needing the toilet very frequently, and can seem to pee whenever im near a toilet, (dont know if this is psychological?) - but even after ive just been to the toilet, it feels like I need to go again.. This frequent pee'ing has been ongoing for about 6 to 12 months id say at guess? (I know this isnt really related but im just trying to describe everything ive experience so that I can give the best idea possible, as someone may be able to relate).. Also been getting pain under my ribs (on both the left and right side).. I did go to the dr with this and they said it might just be because of an ulcer or something.. they did feel under my ribs a bit and couldnt feel anything.. so maybe again was just in my head or something.

I know a lot of the above symptoms can be caused by anxiety/stress as well, but the tiny bumps/lumps are what concerns me most.. I know u can get cysts and stuff, but from everything ive explained above, what are the chances of this being bad? - Considering ive left this for so long now as well, its just making me more worried!

basically looking for some re-assurance here and anybody whos had similar as above, and can advise what could be going on here.. I seem to be falling apart! - im only 20 years old and have so much more yet to achieve.

PS: I think the support given on this forum is outstanding, ive been lurking for a few weeks and have only just come to posting on here, but from what ive read you guys do really seem to be a great community. obviously i dont want the "need" to have to be on here, just like anyone, but hopefully some of you can give some input here for me.

PPS: sorry for the very long post, it does take a small weight of my shoulders just being able to write this here and get this out..

Thank you so much in advance to any advice given. will check back here frequently for any replies.

Mark-t

[mark-t92]

also to add: im from the UK, not that it makes much or any difference at all, but i havent added that to my profile yet thanks.

[Davepet]

I dont seem to have it in me to go to the dr and get it checked i dont know why but even though I know i need to, I just cant do it.. so telling me to do that isnt going to help me much.

Well some of the things you describe should be looked at by the doctor, and sooner rather than later. You know you need to do it, so sorry, find a way to get over whatever is making you drag your feet & go. Delay is absolutely the wrong thing to do right now..

Dave