9 years out

[Samson01]

As of July 2012, I'm nine years out from dx of stage III. I wish I could say it has been all roses, but it hasn't. Do alot of long term survivors find it tough to cope?

[Davepet]

What sorts of problems are you dealing with, Samson?

[Samson01]

Hi Davepet,
In 2005, a few years after dx, I had a break and psychosis due to clinical depression. I haven't been the same since. Just haven't felt like part of this world since. I can operate and seem functional, but just don't want to be involved with anything that doesn't include my family. They say I had a bad reaction to chemo and had to stop it a week early before my HCG went normal. It finaly went normal as I was being setup for salvage. I haven't been able to shake the experience, despite Dr.'s and therapy. Thanks, Tim

[Scott]

Tim, have you looked for a different therapist? How's your family doing?

[zesasmom]

As a mom of a son with tc i have only experienced this from a caregivers point of view. But i have struggled with clinical depression and anxiety for some time and understand your feelings. Its extremely hard and i just want you to know youre in my thoughts. Ive found some meds that help and yes a good therapist also to some degree.

Best

Lori
eli smom

[Samson01]

Thanks for getting back to me. I'm seeing a Dr. and am on meds (ssri's), but treatment hasn't been effective. With every med change, I respond for a short time then back in the dumps again. I'm thinking there is a combined problem including low test. I'll start looking into that possibility. As a father of four, I have to be active to some degree, but the homelife isn't so great. My wife never fully recovered from my own sickness it seems. She will not seek counseling. There is a lack of trust ...not in each other, but in the situation. I guess we are still shell shocked by the whole ordeal. Tim

[mpalka6]

I'm sorry to hear that about you and your family. We are just starting here. So scared and worried. We are young living a dream and what now. Sometimes I asked myself if we ever be "normal" again? I don't know ...I just want him to be safe again to be with me and our son. Best wishes for you to find happiness.

[Jimmerz]

So Sorry to hear that. Nothing hurts me more than a family that is struggling. We will say prayers for you and your family that you can re-discover each other in a new way and begin to enjoy the gift that you have which is Life and each other!

Hang in there and DO NOT GIVE UP!.

[Samson01]

Don't worry...I never give up, just get tired sometimes.

[zesasmom]

I have also tried many meds and yes some help.more than others and even with meds its still sometimes a struggle. My sons diagnosis has been extremely.hard for me and ive been to my dr several times as im struggling with clinical depression and its very hard to explain unless youve experienced it. With my son he was very lucky that he caught it early stage Ia nonseminoma and is on surveillance. Although im so grateful for the early diagnosis i still struggle with the feelings of hopelessness. I have no answers or wisdom to offer but please know that you and youre family are in my thoughts.

[zesasmom]

Glad to hear you never give up!! )

[Samson01]

Thanks all. Zesasmom, In the long haul, it has been my faith that has got me through some dark nights. It has helped me make sense of things and keeps me going. I'm just indifferent to most things now. I don't have a distain for it, just the world has lost it shine I guess. I don't expect many to understand my own experience's even after cancer, but it is clear that it is a road cut for me. I feel that I have been seperated. Tim